I have always perceived my life as struggle. As a young child I can recall watching certain movies (namely the Rocky franchise!) that were built upon an underdog theme and strongly resonating with the character. Something within me was drawn toward the struggle, the hurt, the pain; the secrets that lay deep within the hidden elements or surface disguise of that person- the fact that it was a fictional character made no difference, I felt powerful emotions and a fighters spirit like waves and tides through my soul.
Perhaps because I view my life as something out of a Rocky movie and fighting against the odds I have supported that struggle in some way. My perception of life never giving me what I want, or always having to fight for some victory through times of darkness and despair has potentially escalated the complexity of my life, and many painful lessons have repeated. For a long time, particularly through my earlier years, I kept asking “why me”? “Why me” can be a very confusing, disempowering and dark place forged in loss and lack.
“Why me” enhances a victim mentality that keeps us locked into the struggle of that circumstance. And we are all guilty of feeling this way and maybe supporting this avenue of thinking at some point in our lives. It is natural to question why we experience certain things in our lives, but we should aim to not stay chained within that paradigm, in this way we can move through it. When we can remove ourselves from our limiting beliefs or harsh impact of that situation we can broaden our mind to the bigger picture of what each experience requires of us and is trying to teach us. Perspectives are precious; if we can shift the way we look at something then we can change our entire experience of it and take action from a platform of an open heart and mind.
“When you’re scared, when you’re hanging on, when life is hurting you, then you’re going to see what you’re really made of”- Sylvester Stallone
Life is a spiral with many twists and turns
As we evolve and grow as people, we will return to similar experiences and life lessons that test our resolve and capacity to overcome. If there are particular themes that continue to play out in your life, there is a reason for it as everything has purpose on your life path. We will draw people and experiences toward us at a subconscious level because there is something more for us to learn from them. If we keep trying to deny our challenges, our pain, fears and sorrow then we remain tightly knit within them. Be open to the lessons and allow your heart to guide you toward a new way forward. Our mind/ego will pull us toward frustration when life sets us upon a similar lesson to re-visit…we complicate the process of life’s inherent flow when we think we have learnt it all and now it seems we are moving backward. When we sit within judgement, blame, and ego-oriented beliefs then we defensively raise our guard rather than expose ourselves to the experience so we can transcend it.
There is no finish-line on the path to soul growth- there is no race, no perfect place to get to where life is easy. We can release judgement and fear-based thinking when we entertain that life is a journey with many pit-stops along the way and we are responsible for finding the beauty at every twist and turn.
“I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road”- Stephen Hawking
People and Experiences act as Catalysts
Often we fight against the people that hurt us and experiences that emotionally wounded us in some way. We fight against the pain they caused, the betrayal, the toxicity of what they created within us. As long as we continue to battle with our emotional wounds they will gain momentum and swirl up storms of inner grief and destruction. We draw our sword and raise our shield to protect ourselves because we never wanted this pain…as human beings we fear pain so greatly that we arm ourselves with whatever it takes to disguise our vulnerability and shield our heart. If we can turn the tables on how we view the people and challenges that cause us inner conflict then we can begin to see them as catalysts instead. Catalysts toward inspiring a greater sense of self, and peeling back the layers of what we subconsciously created to keep ourselves ‘safe’. We are transformed by the deepest and darkest touches of pain as profoundly as the wildest and wonderful touches of love.
We fear emotional exposure and yet this is what we need in order to dance with life rather than sit on the sidelines in false protection mode. There are riches to be found in every person or experience that allows us to chip away at our old ways of seeing, being, and doing to prompt a powerful renewal and regeneration of who we are.
“I have always believed, and I still believe, that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform it into something of value”- Hermann Hesse
Life is not a straight line; it is seamless and swerves us this way and that way so we can pick up deeper pockets of love, compassion, inner strength and resiliency along the way. Embrace life’s drama’s, curves and hits as fuel that inspires you to seek your authentic mark, work with the circumstance rather than against it. We may sometimes feel like life is punishing us, but it is actually pushing us toward our own enlightenment- stay open to your unlimited potential.
We are responsible for how we use all our experiences so we engage with life through a lens of love, enhanced sense of self, inner wisdom and higher consciousness.